Paula Deen - herself - now available at your local supermarket

Paula Deen story:  http://bit.ly/15v837x

After 11 years with the Food Network, Paula Deen has instructed you to take a 'cup of owwwul' and 'a stick of butter' for the last time.

The heavies at Food Network have told PD to POQ (Piss Off Quick). Apparently for racial slurs. The story also asserts that possibly an assortment of other touchy subjects for the Network have been simmering in Paula's pot for a while. Things are rarely simple in life, right?

Anyway, the title of this news story clearly states Paula has been "canned by Food Network". So, naturally we can only assume they have sliced 'n' diced PD and put her in a can to be available for sale on our supermarket shelves. The Food Network only hopes it will make as much money from Paula this way, as it did from her being on TV.

Open up and eat a can of Paula? Some might find her a little hard to digest - she could pass right through them. "From mah can to yerrrs"

Devastating news for America: Michele Bachmann won't be seeking re-election in 2014

Michele enlists the help of some friends to bury what she doesn't know about the American Constitution (look, here she is in the middle!).

They'll be digging for quite some time yet.

Oh, Michele. Pity you won't be running for re-election in 2014 - just like Sarah Palin before you, you generously gave the media so much to play with. You made it too easy.

And it's wonderful that Michele decided to write her memoir Core of Conviction (http://nyti.ms/168lfBC). Although, the only problem was that her editor (coincidentally also a Republican) missed a crucial spelling mistake. The title should have been Core of Convection --You see, Michele's original intention was a book  about her desire to share with America inspiring tips on how to maintain even oven temperatures in the act of being submissive to your husband, making him delicious home-cooked meals. I think Americans would've preferred to endure such basic tips, rather than a story about her life.

The Writing Process

Just write. Don't think too much. Dob't Don't correct, just write. Practice writing - keep practicing. Use and trust your own voice. Lose control when you're writing. Forget ego. Write even if you don't feel like it. Don't be abstract - write the real stuff; give details and be honest.

I think of something to write about and post on my writing blog as well as continue the two memoir stories I'm trying to write - with the time I haven't got. I draw and post my weekly (ok, sometimes it's not every week) cartoon. I log in to Twitter and Tweet my writing and cartoon blog posts, as if they are the most important and interesting Tweets in the world today. Spend some time "interacting" (isn't that what we do?) with others on Twitter. Look for and hope there's some activity about ME! Follow some people. Hope that my Followers number gets fatter and juicier. Do the same for Pinterest - although by "Pinning" and having a poke around.

OK.  How's my personal website looking? How can I improve it, make it more relevant and interesting to other people out there? It's still a freebie website. Should I take that leap and fork out for a paid one? Will that make me look more professional and accomplished?

Got to build this "writer's platform". Shit, I'll make this thing a huge bloody oil rig with the biggest platform pylons you've ever seen. A Texan-writer's platform.

Haven't had dinner yet and I'm getting hungry. At least my lame lunch for tomorrow - as every other day - of  a crunchy peanut butter and Nutella sandwich is made. Two pieces of fruit, a little ziplock bag (these bags never seem to lock in the easy "zip" action as promised - or am I just buying the crap brands?) of nuts and a yogurt join the sandwich sitting in a plastic shopping bag, lying in the refrigerator. I'll use this same shopping bag the whole week.

Better go prepare and eat dinner now.

I don't have a Facebook account. That's right, don't have one. Great, that's at least one "writing" thing I don't have to do tonight.